Thursday, June 25, 2015

Life

I forgot about this blog. I completely forgot about it. I downloaded the Blogger app tonight and it automatically logged me into this. And, let's be honest, reading it tonight made me incredibly sad. Superbaby is now 3 years old. Superboy is now 7 years old and is getting ready to start  3rd grade. Superdad has changed jobs twice since this blog was regularly used. I have a job. An incredibly stressful, ridiculously difficult job.

I never imagined I would not be a stay at home mom. My world came crashing down after Superdad lost his job when I was writing this blog. Things really haven't been the same since. They aren't necessarily worse or better, just so different.

Superbaby (Superpreschooler just doesn't have the same ring to it) is the sweetest, most obnoxious kid in the whole world. I love him so much that, sometimes, when he's being extra cute and quiet, I get tears in my eyes just looking at him. He's full of so many questions and talks incessantly at home, although he is very quiet and shy around others. He still wants my breasts to rest on when he's tired or upset. Isn't that amazing? The breasts that brought him nutrition for the first two years of his life still bring him comfort.

Superboy is amazing. I mean. He just amazes me every day. He is my little twin and I love him so much. He's going into third grade! I can't believe my baby is going into third grade. He had a fantastic 2nd grade year and absolutely adored his teacher. He's starting to require privacy and wants to have friends over and go to sleepovers.

Superdad is now a market manager for a vending service in our town. He loves and hates his job. God willing, there is hopefully a really great job opportunity opening up for him in the coming months. We are still very much in love, even though we drive each other nuts sometimes. He is my best friend and I'm so thankful I have him to do life with.

We found a really great church home last year. We've been going to NewSpring church and have really grown to love it. We have a home group that we meet with regularly. We are both volunteers in Kidspring. I never ever imagined that we would find such happiness in a "mega church" but we very much have. We spent several months last year falling in love with Jesus and with each other all over again.

Me? How am I doing? I don't even know how to put it into words. I will say that I had a very dark time in the last 3 months and I am hopefully finally on the mend. It's a struggle every day. I'm currently out of work due to the issues I've had, but I'm set to return in 3 weeks, which causes all sorts of anxiety and depression to think about. I have thoroughly enjoyed my time being at home with my boys, even at my darkest. I hope to find some resolutions for my issues soon. Until then, I'm just white knuckling this whole life thing.

I will say that I have been doing so much better with the help of a great team of doctors and other medical professionals. I am working on me for a change. I have gained 75 pounds since last summer and that makes me very unhappy. I'm starting a weight loss journey and hope I can eventually become a runner. I'll make a separate post for this because it just doesn't seem to fit here.

For now....
All my love,
Supermom (sometimes)